Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
