i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
A+ Viking dick
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
