i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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