Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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