oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
