i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
