I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
