Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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