Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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