he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I will be naked everywhere
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
