They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
