I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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