So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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