No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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