i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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