As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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