i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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