Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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