Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
