Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
As shirtless as possible
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
