dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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