dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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