found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
