That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
...so i touched it.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
