I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
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