So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
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I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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