He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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