What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize