you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
