how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
