i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
