Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?