I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN