If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
