Dignity is for republicans.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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