Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
bring money and cleavage
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
