They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Enjoy the penises
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
