Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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