when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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