You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
