doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
The uberlube is also flammable
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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