i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
