you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
