I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
