as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
foreskin is a definite game changer
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
