I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
