fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
