I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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