I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize