Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
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I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
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Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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