Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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