party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize